MAGAZINE MADNESS - TAKE TWO

Last year, I had a lot of fun taking all of the January magazine headlines that promise weight loss in the new year, and editing them to add a little humor. After all, this is a particularly trying time for people letting go of the diet mentality and shame about body size. I got lots of great feedback and several suggestions to make this an annual event.

Now that we're a week into January, you've undoubtedly seen the bombardment of tips to create a new and better you in 2011. I also wish you a year that's nourishing and joyful...but living a full and satisfying life just doesn't come from hating your body.

I made my annual trip to the newsstand yesterday. This year, there were a few magazines that seemed to stay away from diet and weight loss tips - could it be that they're finally getting it? But alas, there were still plenty to choose from - I offer them to you with the same suggestions from last year:

• First, take a deep breath. And now another one.
• Remember that if any of them really worked, they wouldn't need to keep coming up with more.
• Finally, a little humor always helps. With that in mind, here is my attempt at rewriting some of my "favorites."

People Magazine:

Half Their Size: How They Did It

My Edit:

Full Of Themselves: What They Did To Promote Compassion In The World

Shape

Drop 10 Pounds by Feb. 1

My Edit:

Drop 10 Pounds by Feb 1: Gain Back 15 Pounds by March 1

Allure:

I Lost 107 Pounds...For Good: One Woman's Diet Victory

My edits:

I Lost 107 Pounds...For Good: One Woman's (And We Mean ONLY One Woman's) Diet Victory (The Other 2, 167, 682 Women Gained It All Back...)

or

I Lost 107 Pounds...As Of Eight Months After My Diet. Check Back With Me Next Year At This Time

or

I Lost 107 Pounds...For Good: I Know This Because I'm Psychic And Can Predict The Future

Self:

Lose Weight Without Trying: Your Weight Loss Grocery List (Yep, Chocolate's On It)

My Edit:

Stop Trying To Lose Weight: Develop A Nourishing Grocery List (Yep, Chocolate's On It)

Fitness

Drop 2 Dress Sizes In Just 4 Weeks

My Edit:

Did You Drop 2 Dress Sizes In Just 4 Weeks? You May Have An Eating Disorder

O Magazine:

Weight Loss Made Simple: The Only Tip You'll Ever Need (p. 126)

My Edit: Weight Loss Made Simple: Don't Diet!*

(* I saw this cover online, so for all I know, the tip on p. 126 really is: Don't Diet...)

Marie Claire:

Another Year, Another Diet: How To Really Lose Those Last 5 lbs.

My Edit:

Another Year, Another Diet: Because Your Diet From Last Year Failed You Once Again. How To Make Peace With Food And Your Body

GQ ((yes, men were included too this year...)

A Man's Guide To Dropping The Last (And Hardest) Ten Pounds

My Edit:

That's what she said! Ouch!!!

(for those of you who are fans of The Office)

Glamour (kudos for not suggesting anything weight and diet related, but no harm in making it size friendlier too :)

10 Signs That You're Amazing In Bed

My Edit:

10 Signs That You're Amazing In Bed: At Any Size

Have some New Year's fun too and add your own headlines and edits in the comment section of this entry for all to see. Also, feel free to repost/tweet this link.

Until next year,

Eat well! Live well! Be well!

(And avoid toxic magazine messages)

Judith